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April 7, 2014

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "The Iron Sofa" published April 6, 2014 - Andy: You aren't watching "Game of Thrones," you're too young. Jason: You can't tell me what to do, woman! Andy: Excuse me?? I'm your mother! Jason: And I am your king! Now bow before my iron sofa and pray I forgive your insolence! Andy: Hello, HBO? I'd like to cancel... Jason: Mom, I was kidding! These aren't even iron! They're cardboard! Marcus: You said she was fine with this! That's why you said to attach them with super glue!

The Iron Sofa

April 6, 2014

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Loop-de-loopholes" published March 30, 2014 - Teacher: I SAID NO MORE PAPER AIRPLANES! Jason: I thought you said no MERE paper airplanes.

Loop-de-loopholes

March 30, 2014

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Candy™Farm™Dungeon™" published March 23, 2014 - Game: Welcome to Candy Farm Dungeon! Let's play! Hint: Optional gummy tokens are available for purchase at any time for only $0.99 each. Manually sweetening a new dungeon is really tedious and can take hours. Use a gummy token to automate this task. Even the best sugar sniffers can get lost in the dark. Use one token for a torch and another two for a map. Many players find the game's shrill music to be annoying. Use five tokens to mute it. Some games have bugs that cause crashes and the loss of saved progress. Use 10 tokens to ensure this isn't one of them. Privacy important? Use 25 tokens to stop this app from accidentally sharing all of the e-mails, texts, and photos stored on this phone with the people in your address book. Jason: I meant to warn you about that game. Peter: Aaaa! How do I turn it of?! Game: Buttons sometimes break. Use 40 tokens to diagnose the problem...

Candy™Farm™Dungeon™

March 23, 2014

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Jabberguac" published March 16, 2014 - Andy: Twamato, and avoc ados...did styr with unn-yunn in the lime...all mincy were the jal'penos...and c'lantro for the rhyme. BEWARE THE JABBERGUAC, MY SON!... Andy: You're officially scaring me now, mother.

Jabberguac

March 16, 2014

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Spring Forwarder" published March 9, 2014 - Jason: Daylight savings time is so annoying. I mean, if they're gonna make us turn all our clocks ahead, they should at least have it be a time change worth the hassle. One hour is just so paltry. Why not move everyone's clocks ahead by 25 hours? Then today would be Monday and I'd be in the middle of a sweet, sweet math test. or 673 hours? Then it'd be April 6 and "Game of Thrones" would be resuming tonight. Or 3,103,101 hours? Then it'd be the year 2368 and I could sing Klingon opera in the shower without mom and dad freaking out like they did the other day. Peter: Dude, they thought you were dying. Jason: MEeee-looooooo-taaaaaaa...

Spring Forwarder

March 9, 2014

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