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Currently browsing tag

food

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Impossible Dream" published July 5, 2020 - Roger: I had the craziest dream last night. Andy: No way was it crazier than mine. Roger: I dreamed Lin-Manuel Miranda and Bruce Springsteen were writing a musical based on my life. So they flew to Texas to watch me give quarterback lessons to a young Patrick Mahomes. Then we all went to Whataburger, where I discovered if I ate patty melts left-handed I'd lose weight. What was yours? Andy: I dreamed I had a civil and informed political discussion on Facebook. Roger: Ok, that's way beyond crazy. You win. Andy: I'm kinda bummed I woke up.

Impossible Dream

July 5, 2020

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Tough Cookie" published June 14, 2020 - Paige: Want one of the cookies I made? Jason: YOU made them? Eww! Gross! Blecch! Vomit City. Paige: Never mind. Jason: Ok, fine, I'll try one.

Tough Cookie

June 14, 2020

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Cereal Killer" published May 24, 2020 - Andy: Peter, I'm trying to go to the store less often, so if you could cut back on the food consumption, I'd appreciate it. Peter: I AM cutting back. Andy: Maybe cut back a tiiiiiiny bit more. Peter: We're almost out of milk again, by the way.

Cereal Killer

May 24, 2020

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Weighty Matters" published May 10, 2020 - Andy: Jason, would you mind setting the table for dinner? Jason: Ask Peter to do it. Andy: Peter set the table last night. Jason: Yeah, but he's twice as heavy as I am, so he should have to do it twice as often. Andy: I don't follow... Jason: You said when it comes to chores, everyone needs to pull their own weight. Andy: I didn't mean literal weight. Jason: In fact, if ANYONE should be setting the table, it's DAD. Roger: Hey!

Weighty Matters

May 10, 2020

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Mega Combo" published February 16, 2020 - Cashier: Is something wrong? Peter: Um, yeah, I ordered one of your mega combos. Cashier: And? Peter: I only received three things: A large burger, large fries and a large soda. Cashier: Right. That's what it is. Peter: You do understand that the prefix "mega" means "one million"? Seems to me that truth-in-advertising laws require you to add 999,997 more food items to my tray. I'll wait. Cashier: The "mega" actually refers to the number of calories. Peter: Oh. I knew there had to be a loophole. Steve: Solid effort, though.

Mega Combo

February 16, 2020

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Chocolate Sampler" published February 9, 2020 - Paige: Ooo... Is that Valentine's candy? Roger: It's a two-pound box of chocolates for your mother. Paige: Is it a kind she likes? Mom's pretty picky when it comes to chocolates. Maybe you should let me sample one, just to make sure. Oh, wait. It's an assortment? I should probably try one of each type, in that case. Yup, these are all good. You'll be fine. Peter: Ooo... Is that Valentine's candy? Roger: It's a one-pound box of chocolates for your mother.

Chocolate Sampler

February 9, 2020

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